Hi friends, once again I am here but it is the last time because today I’ll finish my writing in this diary. This diary has very few pages left in it and I also have to devote my more and more time in studies so I took this decision. Don’t you worry my dear! I’ll come once again with lot more interesting things to discuss with you but after the exam (8th February 2009) in the new diary. Till then this is my last day with you and I hope that you will enjoy. So thanks in advance!
Today I’ll not discuss about any article. I’ll discuss only about me, my thinking, my views and my experiences so far. At the end or in between I’ll share about today’s happenings. Alright!
Okay, last day I was discussing about the various preferences in life. And I also gave an example of myself, about my study preferences now days. Remember? There are times when you should choose the best option for your future life. In these times preferences comes into play. There are lots of choices to choose from, and accordingly we gave them preferences depending upon the requirement. Before all that we do a quick analysis about their effects in our future life. For some people this future could be one step ahead (means a very short period) while for others it may be a long planning. When time comes to take a decision or choose from any choices then our thinking plays a vital role in it. And thinking, itself made by our own experiences.
For me thinking is nothing but reality of a person from the core of his heart, truly. I have developed my thinking to analyze myself in various phases of my life. I’ve also changed my thinking by analyzing the experiences of others by listening to them, by reading their views and by talking to them. I realized that thinking can easily be molded in a wrong direction just by not analyzing the actual fact. I want to clear this thing with an example:- If there is a confliction between two people and if we have to judge, who is right?, then what should we do? We’ll listen them one by one. With this we can found that everyone is blaming other by his individual thinking or interpretation. Being a judge we should not go to this interpretation/emotion of the person. We should only understand the facts about the confliction. Often in our lives we were flown by the emotions or wrong interpretation. In these cases our judgments were wrong. We can make them right just by analyzing the basic facts of the situation. And can give the right decision on the basis of these facts. Don’t get confused by this to take it like I’ve diverted from the origin. Because I gave an example of, how we made judgments?
To choose or to make preferences, judgment is needed. If we make preferences on the basis of the facts then it would be much better for every situation. To choose from available options requires decision making, judgment. And if we are flown by the emotions then we can’t see the long term benefits. The best thing to make a judgment is to identify and analyze the basic facts. That’s it!
I was very much influenced by thought which says “Whatever behavior you want back, you should behave in the same way”. If you want to be loved, love others or spread love, if you want respect give respect. In Hindu mythology one saying is also has a great importance. “Give it others, it’ll become countless- immeasurable in you”. I think there is no need to explain this more. One line is enough or self explainable. Just think about it!
Now I want to write about my experiences, what I’ve learned from the conditions, situation and good or bad experiences. There are lots of such incidents that I’ve faced in my life and I’ve learned something from them. And I think some incidents had changed my thinking into a positive one. With that I started every incident in such a way that it’ll give me a better exposure of how to live wonderful life, what wrong I did, can I improve? and lots more. In every incident I analyze myself and always have a tendency to improvising myself.
From the experiences of books I have learned lots of such reasons on improve me. ‘You Can Win’ by SHIV KHERA, a book from which I’ve learned a lot, truly. In this book writer told the different ways of improvement. And I want to give some of them too, which I like most and I had applied on me.
First one is to improve the way of thinking is, by assuming yourself as you are being watched by your parents in doing some work. If you are doing wrong then you have a feeling that your parents have shame on you or they feel bad. But if you are doing something good your parents will proud on you. So with this you might analyze what is wrong or what is right? Yes or no?
Another way is putting you in such a way that you are being watched by your children. Children only understand what they see. Right? If you are doing right you’ll continue doing it. However if you are doing wrong then you’ll stop yourself doing this because you don’t want to give poor education to your children.
I was very much inspired with this. And I shared this with everyone with which I can. Right now I am writing here so that if someone has left, he’ll get from it. Good thinking na….! This is what I am.
I am inspired by lots of things, lots of daily happenings, spiritual motivators and saints also. I always wanted to give suggestions and I ignored the others because of perhaps the ego-driven thinking. I was thinking myself much superior myself in thoughts as no one can be on this earth. I didn’t want to do anything in spite of blaming others that they did wrong not me. But at those moments I used to say that you can improve, but at the same time I used to forget that I also can improve. This thinking was changed by someone, ‘spiritual speaker’. I think he was ‘Asharam bapuji. They told me in his satsang once that we usually tend to improve others by becoming ‘RAISINGH’, ‘RAIBAHADUR’, etc and we want to give the suggestions to the others always. He told, “Actually individually growth is counted”. So instead of giving suggestions to them take from for your up-lift-ment. And if you want to do something best for the others then instead of showing their weakness by giving them suggestions, you should appreciate them. You should show them their strengths. You should motivate them instead of suggest them.
This whole story can be understood in a very effectual way by assuming it like a rule. We want to give the suggestions and want to be appreciated by every one. Change the rule by replacing suggestions and appreciated words. Now the rule becomes- we want to appreciate and to be suggested by others. Just a simple change in things can increase the happy moments/cheerful moments of your life. Just think in this way and you’ll see that your life has become more joyful. You enjoy every single moment of your life. And every single moment you are happy from the bottom of your heart. You can think about this big change of your life fro now onwards. Here I’m not saying that suggestion is not important. But first of all we should analyze ourselves that “Are we capable of suggesting others?” growth of a team does matter. I know it matters. But it’s only on worldly basis and for worldly matters. While for divine purposes your own individual growth in counted. Remember this throughout your life!
I believe that our constant, deep and focused thinking/analysis of every single moment of your life can create a big difference in between what we are now and what we can become tomorrow. It’s totally up to us what we think and how we think? It’s up to the perspective of every individual. But if you wish to be improved and it’s a firm belief of yours then I am sure GOD will show the paths of success in achieving your aims/goals/wishes, etc. because GOD help those who helps themselves. It’s the oldest and still the greatest thought that we know. A desire of improvement, of your uplift can create a big difference.
I think GOD is the ultimate power in the whole universe. If we have faith, miracles can happen. That’s all…….. (Tea Break).
Nice tea! Now it’s time, a perfect time to think about LOVE. Well I have not done the discussion on this topic. I did with 3-4 people in my life with DEEPU BHAI, ALOK, ANUPAM and MONA. Right now I think that something should be discussed about it. What I feel, what I think about it, etc. So here are some definitions of the great word ‘LOVE’ by me.
It is a divine feeling. It acts alike a force between our relationships with the world and worldly things. Some major parts of love are sense of caring, sacrifice, understanding and belief. These words define the properties of love but actually the love can not be understood without feeling. It only can be felt. There is no way to understand it without feeling it. The above four words can give you idea of this divine feeling. May be there are more words related to this but here I am giving about what I think about love. Starting with the first word which is ‘SENSE OF CARING’ which also means look after or take care. This word can be understood with the feel as like our parents look after us, fulfill our needs or demands. Being a child this is a best way to understand it.
Second word is ‘SACRIFICE’ is also a way to express our love towards our family members as our parents do; our nation as soldiers do. That kind of sacrifice is at very big level might be unable to understand. So I am giving here an example to understand it in a better way. Suppose I have a chocolate and my sister also have the same. The thing is that she likes it more than me. If she had eaten her chocolate and if I give her my chocolate then it is also a sacrifice which is self expressing the divine feeling of love. However it is at a very basic level. Third word is- ‘UNDERSTANDING’. It is a word that affects our family life mostly. And I think the major impact on the married life. Since I am not at this level to explain this in detail, but yes! I can feel it. You can take this word as like EMPATHY because it suggests that what would we do if we were in the same situation? Empathy is like “assuming ourselves to be in someone’s place”. Fourth word BELIEF is also somehow related to understanding. You must believe on the person you love. A good understanding is a reason to generate belief. These are my own views noticed, analyzed, owned by myself. Since I have not discussed with lots of people, they might be wrong. If you found them wrong or if you have any other idea about this which you think I should have discussed in this diary, then you can tell me. I’ll really appreciate your feedback. And if you want to know more about these words I would like to assist you on that. Thank you so much to read all this. If you have doubts and you think I can clear them then you are most welcome. And if you have suggestions I feel pleasure to listen from you and increase my knowledge about it.
That’s all for this word. Actually it’s everlasting, never ending word. It can be expressed in thousand of pages but still can’t be understood without feel. So it’s more important to feel or to know your own views about this. But you should discuss them with someone like I did in this diary. However it’s not the perfect way. It would be much better that you discuss with the person you love or friends…. Rest is up to you.
I think that I have discussed a lot about myself but still something (actually much more) is remaining. However here I am not going to discuss remaining things because of time and paper shortage. Here I want to give some special moments about my life. What I feel and noticed some changes that are required in me, with the help of someone special. Yes she is my cousin sister ‘MONA’. Why I am saying her special person because by true means I have learnt a lot from her. Her thinking is so much good and pure. She also has done a good analysis on me. She told me my true strengths and my weaknesses. And also the reason why is that so? Good thing is that she told me the ways of how can I overcome my weaknesses?
So I think she has all the qualities that a true friend must have. And because she is my friend, I am very much thankful to GOD.
Now you all know my strengths, right now I want to tell you my weaknesses noticed by the beautiful girlfriend MONA. Okay. First and very important notice she told me is that “bhaiya, you don’t want to change yourself but want to change others according to you”. This is the biggest and toughest analysis a person can do. Really she was exactly right at that time. I know that my thinking is very good. I don’t want to change my thinking according to others but want that others should accept mine. I think if they do so they will also live the tension free life like me.
I told all this to MONA, and how beautifully she replied. She told me that bhaiya I know that your mind and thoughts are so pure and true but if you want to changed it means you don’t want some more improved thoughts that are exists in the world but still missing in you. If you continue thinking in the same way your thoughts become limited and then your life wouldn’t be much interesting. But if you allow more thoughts to be come into your mind then you feel good from inside because change is the key of happiness. Everything is changing continuously in this world. So why are you becoming constant by your thoughts. There is much satisfactory and happy life waiting for you, feel it!
What a useful comment from her. This is what I expect from her being a true friend. In our talks most of the time I speak about my experiences, thoughts, etc… by being silent or by her very small answers, she increase my attention towards her. Why? Because whenever she replied with her gestures, postures or small talk her analysis was perfect. So she behaves like a mirror for me. I can see my strengths and weaknesses in her way of replying. Really it’s really hard to find such a person in life. It is the grace of GOD, nothing else.
Best thing is that she always says that you are the best bhaiya. She told me that with your experience sharing and your spiritual knowledge, I’ve learnt a lot. In my slam book she wrote that she started changing her thinking and something good happening starts in her life. She has mentioned me as a ‘lucky charm’ but don’t take it otherwise. She is really pure from her heart.
Before that I was not much talkative but now I think that I can speak. She inspires me. From her written skills in her own diary I was very much inspired. And this inspiration can easily be seen by watching my diary. Yes, this one! Something about myself, my life, my thoughts, my experiences, my knowledge, my strengths, weaknesses my spiritual life and lots of other things as well, she means a lot for me.
Okay, it’s time for dinner. We’ll meet at 11 in the night to fill remaining one page after completing my daily studies for today. Till then enjoy.
Oh, it’s gonna be late so come here now to complete this last page as well. After that I’ll go for some chat with MONA because its Saturday today. One thing I want to tell you that there is no one who can take this place of MONA in my heart, but if you love to take challenges and think that I can inspire you more than MONA, so what are you waiting for. Just talk to me please.
This is the last page but very important page for me and my life. In this page I want to tell you something more about my heart. Ready to know about it?
It’s a feeling to make my parents happy. Give them that much happiness which they can’t even think about. In true means my parents feel very happy by seeing me growing. It’s the same feeling of everyone’s parents. My father always has an expectation from me. From the childhood he keeps me teaching. In my board exams he thought that I’ll get very good marks. But I couldn’t make it that much good. In every single semester of my B.Tech, he wanted a good percentage of marks. But that time also I was unable to do. He feels happy but he always says that you could make much better than that. Remember it next time. I gave the assurance that yes father I’ll remember this and in the next semester you will definitely see something much better. But at the end of semester…. Same result. The he feel really upset. I, myself make a promise of improvement next time but every single time I was unable to make it happen. B.Tech ends and in the last semester I’ve got 78% marks a real good improvement but it won’t affect much on overall percentage.
Now at this time I have got a chance to make his dream come true. To get a good rank in GATE and to do M.Tech with one of the IIT and hired by a big company. This time I have to work hard to give this ultimate happiness to my parents. I know I can do it but to achieve this I have to work hard, more hard. I have to devote my maximum of time in studies to learn new and review the old concepts.
May GOD bless me this time so that I can see my parents happy. I want to see my success in my parents’ gloomy eyes. This is my dream. Biggest dream of mine. I can take it as an aim of mine. And hoping for that to be true. Let’s pray for me please. May my focus on my goal will not be diverted till I get it. This time, just once I want success, I need to be succeeded. That’s all for tonight till I don’t get my aim, I’ll not come again writing in diary.
So if you want to read about my experiences pray for my dream gets completed. Thank you. May GOD bless all of us. Bye-bye, good bye and good night.
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